Enough

You’ve gotta be kidding!

Me?  I’m nobody.  I’m nothing.

Why would anyone want to read what I have to say?

I’m going to write a book?  Not me!!  Are you CRAZY?

I liked me. I really did. I do.

But I didn’t feel worthy of anything. My self worth was so low that I couldn’t see how God may choose ME for writing a book. Who am I? I was nothing. I am nobody.

One day a little boy asked his mom for lunch to feed 5,000 people.  His mom packed a lunch for all the people that day.  He had to use wagons to carry it all.  It’s a wonder that the fish didn’t spoil by the time he was able to serve it.  Fish should be kept at a certain temperature so he kept a close eye on it so he wouldn’t be reported like a restaurant with bad scores and a health risk.  Finally Jesus asked for his food and he said, “Here, my Mom worked for weeks to get this food ready for all these thousands of people.”

REALLY?!

Um, no.

A little boy.  Not a priest.  Not a preacher.  Not an elder.  Not a deacon.  Not even the wife of one of those.  Not the President of the United States.  Not a leader of the community.  Not a doctor.  Not someone in an elected office.  There was no board meeting.  There was no elders’ meeting asking everyone to vote on what-to-do-for-the-Jesus-is-going-to-feed-all-these-people-and-we-have-to-figure-out-how-to-do-it meeting.  It was one little boy.

Jesus used a little boy to share his food.  Jesus said to bring what little bit you have to offer and He will make it ENOUGH.

A LITTLE BOY brought his lunch and heard Jesus talking.  He offered his lunch to Jesus and surely he was just trying to help.  Surely the little boy didn’t think, “Hey, today I’m going to be part of a miracle so I should shower and put on a tie.”  I just think God uses us as we are.  If our hearts are open and we are listening, God can use us easily.

My problem was low self worth , not low self esteem.

They’re different.

Esteem

-to regard highly or favorably with respect or admiration

Worth

-usefulness or importance as to the world, a person, or for a purpose

I’ve recently met a woman who’s book inspired me to believe again.  Her name is Michelle Prince, author of ‘Winning In Life Now.’  Her book encourages people to work on what you need to work on NOW.

But still who am I to write a book?  Why would anyone want to read what I have to say?  I’m nothing.

I’ve been thinking and listening for a few years now and have realized that’s probably really a slap in the face to God. HE created ME. HE made me just this way for His purpose and I was not letting Him use me for His glory.

Write a book?  Me?  Okay, but just for the record, I think this is crazy.

Dear God, please forgive me for being stubborn and not believing that I was worth something.  Please forgive me for dragging my heels and for thinking that surely you couldn’t mean for me to write a book.  Please use this book to reach people who are hurting and help them heal.  Please help me write what You want it to say.  In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Some weeks and months I don’t write anything.  Sometimes because I think there’s no way I can help every person.  And that’s true.  I can’t help every person but if any one person can heal some because of me writing this book, then it’s totally worth it.  I’m gonna write it and trust God that it will get to the people it is supposed to get to.  My very favorite saying is “to the world you may be just one person but to one person you may just be the world” and to the best of my searching online for where that quote came from, it’s Brandi Snyder quotes I should give credit to.  I don’t know Brandi Snyder but the quote is absolutely too great!

Am I enough?  No I’m not.  But God can take the little offering we bring and MAKE it ENOUGH.

Bring what little you have to offer… loaves and fish… and God will make it ENOUGH.

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