Relationships are important.
A marriage relationship is important and tough (probably tougher than any other relationship ever in the whole world, in my opinion) and totally worth the work.
I’m always looking for simple ways to help relationships be as close and as healthy as they can be. My husband and I have just started doing a few new things for our marriage and we’re noticing this one could be helpful in possibly any relationship.
Here is one experiment we’ve just started a couple weeks ago (and we’re both loving it!)
Every morning we have decided to say (out loud to each other) something good we have noticed or something good that we like about each other.
“One thing I like about you is _____________.”
We get too busy in life sometimes, ya know? With work, school, church, kids, housework, bills, finances, volunteering, rough times, health problems, and a billion more things we can forget to nurture important foundations and critical relationships. It’s not that we mean to; but it’s just that life happens and sometimes we let moments go by that need attention.
(Sweet note: The look on my husband’s face as he speaks is so beautiful and something that’s been hiding for a little while. It’s really nice to see the thought behind his words as he says something kind about me and to me. Sometimes he’s just remembering good things from the past and those are good to hear also. I can’t help but think he may be feeling the same way as he hears me speak good things about him, too. It’s heart-healing.)
This is proving to be a great idea.
One thing it does is it helps us THINK about the positive things during each day (and night) because we know we need to tell each other something we like about each other every day.
(And the negative stuff seems to constantly already be lurking around and threatens to remind us of things we DON’T like about each other… Not sure about you but we’ve had ENOUGH of that!)
Another important result of this experiment is that we’re BOTH getting to HEAR some positive words in the morning. (Yes, it must be genuine and yes it can be something from the past or present. Actually, it could even be something positive we see in the future. Getting to hear blessings spoken over you is powerful.)
Our kids just told us they’d like to be included in this in the evenings. Good stuff can be contagious!
We ALL probably hear WAY too much negative stuff about ourselves (even from our own thoughts) and this is damaging to our brains, hearts, self esteem, and probably in a hundred other ways I’m not thinking to mention.
If you have a great marriage, that’s wonderful! Maybe this can just be icing. (And maybe you’re already doing this.) But many of us have a tougher time in marriage and my husband and I know this can help lots of people so we wanted to share this idea.
I believe absolutely EVERY person could benefit from hearing something good every day that someone notices about him or her.
Here’s one from me to you today: One thing I like about you (yes, you) is that you’re beginning to realize your value; you’re a very worthwhile person and you matter.