Some people want you to believe that they are totally okay; that they have it all together.
Being broken isn’t a bad thing. God says He can use you when you’re broken.
EVERYBODY is broken in some way. God is the ONLY One who can repair the brokenness.
It would take a long time to understand why people react to stuff in life the way they do since each of us is broken in a different way.
Think about it. If we were whole, with nothing at all ever wrong in our lives, we could always 100% of the time react in a healthy way. But we’re just not always okay. And so stress (even good stress) can affect our responses (even when we don’t really want it to.)
If you take time to look around you’ll see some of what it may look like in everyday life and a way you can help because you CAN help (whether you realize it or not.)
You can have a plan already in mind to be kind ~ ANYWAY. Watch for moments because they’re sure to show themselves.
When your boss is moody – show a little more kindness and enthusiasm at work.
When your teacher is upset – turn in your assignment early if possible.
If mom is feeling overwhelmed – do a job or 2 that she didn’t even ask you to do.
If dad seems angry – take a few minutes to remind him how much you appreciate him.
When a student comes to school late or is disrupting class – use gentle, encouraging words (as she may not have heard any recently.)
If the checkout guy is slower than you’d like remember it may his first job (just like once upon a time it was your first job) – be more understanding and speak softer.
When your wife meets you with an icy look – be a little more gentle and help melt it.
When your husband grumbles – make him a snack and remind him of a specific thing you admire about him.
If your employee is having an off day – tell him you’re glad he’s there and he’s valuable (which may be perfect words to lift his energy.)
Even though God is the only One who can do the repairs, WE can STILL be people who help (INSTEAD of rolling eyes, stomping off, making a smartalecky comment, or all the other ways that are NOT helpful…)
Just because someone’s outsides look okay doesn’t mean the insides are okay.
If we’d quit trying to hide all the broken pieces, we’d begin to heal a lot quicker. Jesus is The Answer. And everybody needs more kindness and love.
She doesn’t even know you. How can she affect you?
But it does affect you.
You know those times when you read (or hear) something and it cuts; like it’s directed at you? You can hear something and it SEEMS to be directed at you.
Maybe it is personal but maybe not.
We’ve got to give ourselves permission NOT to listen to (or read) vague, passive aggressive comments carelessly tossed AT us or hatefully said ABOUT us.
It REALLY may NOT be about you. Live, breathe, and enjoy today like it’s NOT about you.
But IF it IS:
If someone truly does have an issue with us we need to rest in the prayer that he or she can find maturity, confidence, and grace to come speak with us about it. And we need to give people permission allowing them to be upset if it’s a problem that is upsetting.
Being upset about something doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing. The very fact that it bothers you is proof that you DO care.
We cannot assume that someone has wrong intentions toward us. Sometimes people do have bad intentions and during those times it’s important to talk if possible and try to work things out. But even then; working things out does not always mean someone who has hurt you will view things the same way as you see them. And that’s okay.
Nobody in the whole world was created to think the exact way you think. It’s okay (and sometimes necessary) if we agree to disagree.
Sometimes people are just angry at life and you are the closest target. For whatever reason they may feel safer taking out their frustration on you rather than the true issue. They may be afraid to confront or discover the core of the pain because it seems unbearable.
[This being said; if it’s abuse, it’s abuse and that’s NOT okay. You may need to talk to a counselor or someone. That’s healthy. That’s not weak. In my opinion finding a counselor (and yes, I will always advise to find a counselor who is a Christian) works best when I pray over everything first. Prayer first is ALWAYS best.]
We can be a safe place for others to vent and we can do this without taking things personally. We can just listen. Just be there. Just hear someone who is hurting.
…Because sometimes it’s really NOT about you.
When you hear someone say something or read a post online that “feels” personal, try this; “God, this has hurt my feelings. Please let this fall away from me if it’s not intended toward me. If it actually is intended toward me and this person actually does have ill feelings please give me courage to speak with them peacefully and give my words grace so that we may both heal. Please prepare my heart and hers (or his) and please stop words from coming out of my mouth that need to not be said. God, please help me be genuine. Please use my life and words to bless others and bring healing and not pain. Thank You for Your constant love. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.”